The Fellowship of the Facebook Status
by sweetypie15
Summary: LOTR's Fellowship of the Ring told through the characters' facebook statuses. UPDATE: The Two Notifications and The Return of the Friend Request are now up! under Aotearoan for author . Yes, Tolkien is turning in his grave.
1. Cncerning Hobbits

**THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE FACEBOOK STATUS UPDATE**S

I was supposed to be doing homework but it ended up like this... I think it's more appropriate on FanFic. More to come if people like it.

**Bilbo Baggins: ****will shortly be celebrating his eleventy-first birthday**

_Five friends are attendin_g A PARTY OF SPECIAL MAGNIFICENCE

**Gandalf Thegrey****: Always arrives precisely when he means to.**

**Frodo Baggins: ****PARTY!! **

_Three people like this._

Pippin: WOOT

**Frodo Baggins ****is a bit worried about his uncle**

Merry Brandybuck: LOL

Frodo Baggins: Srsly, he's acting weird

_Seven friends are attending_ A PARTY OF SPECIAL MAGNIFICENCE

**Pippin Took****: DRUNKING IS FUN FIREWRKS**

**Gandalf Thegrey: **** my fireworks are like a flight of scintillating birds singing with sweet voices**

Pippin Took I_s in a relationship_

**Samwise Gamgee:**** Is wondering whether anyone else saw the dragon**

Merry Brandybuck: was it real???

Frodo Baggins: Don't think so

Pippin Took: Yep its real! I saw it.

Merry Brandybuck: OMG

Pippin Took_changed his relationship status to_ IT"S COMPLICATED

**Frodo Baggins:**** This is getting creepy... :0**

**Samwise Gamgee: r****eally hopes the dragon doesn't burn his potatoes**

Frodo Baggins: Sam WTF?

Pippin Took _is single._

Merry Brandybuck: :(

Pippin Took: It's Ok I was related to her anyway

Merry Brandybuck: ....

Merry Brandybuck_:_ doesn't want to know...

**Frodo Baggins:**** :0**

Sam Gamgee: What happened?

Sam Gamgee; Are you OK Mr Frodo?

Sam Gamgee: U OK??? :)

**Frodo Baggins****: thinks that certain people are bordering on the freak**y-stalky

Sam Gamgee: I know what you mean! Some people just can't take a hint!

**Gandalf Thegrey:**** Is thinking deep and mysterious wizard thoughts**.

**Frodo Baggins****: will take the rin**g.

Sam Gamgee: UR So BRAVE!!!! :D

**Gandalf Thegrey****: Hobbits really are amazing creatures**

Pippin Took _likes this._


	2. From Mushrooms to the Prancing Pony Lol

Hey, I still don't have copyright over any of Tolkien's creations, or of facebook...

Thanks very much for all the positive reviews! :D makes me happy.

**Merry Brandybuck:**** is picking Mushrooms**

Pippin Took _likes this._

**Sam Gamgee:**** Never dropped no eaves!**

_Samwise Gamgee __and __Gandalf Thegrey __are now friends. _

**Pippin Took:**** HOLY SHIT MIKL JACKSON DIED????!?!!**

**Gandalf Thegrey**__**has things to do, people to see**

**Frodo Baggins****: is going on a long journey**

Sam Gamgee: Me too!!

_Frodo Baggins __changed his name to Frodo Underhill._

_Sam Gamgee__ Likes this._

**Sam Gamgee:**__**is the furthest away from home he's ever been...**

Frodo Underhill _is now friends with Ringwraith 1._

Frodo Underhill _i__s no longer friends with Ringwraith 1._

Frodo Underhill:_ is terrified_

**Sam Gamgee****: mushrooms!**

**Pippin Took: ****Musrhomz lol!!!**

_Merry Brandybuck __became a fan of MUSHROOMS_

**Frodo Underhill:**** Doesn't keep water in his pockets**

_Four friends are attending_ THE SIGN OF THE PRANCING PONY

**Sam Gamgee:**** creepy guy in the corner making moves on my main man (hobbit)**

**Frodo Underhill: oops**

**Mysterious Guy: ****THIS is the guy they're trusting with the mission to save the world? Help.**

**Merry Brandybuck: it comes in pints!**

_Pippin Took likes this_.

**Barliman Butterbeer: thinks he's forgotten something...**

**Mysterious Guy:**** All that is gold does not glitter**

_Frodo Underhill: __is now friends with Mysterious Guy._

_Pippin Took __is now friends with Mysterious Guy._

_Merry Brandybuck i__s now friends with Mysterious Guy._

_**Mysterious Guy: **_**srsly, don't trust ne1**

_Sam Gamgee__ has one friend request. _

**Mysterious Guy**** changed his name to Strider.**

_Frodo Underhill __changed his name to Mister Frodo._

**Strider****: Let's get a move on.**

**Pippin Took:**** Is hungry**


	3. To Rivendell!

Thanks so much for the reviews :)

I don't own anything LOTR related! Or facebook!

Please R&R!

**Gandalf Thegrey: ****Ooops....**

_Gandalf Thegrey is no longer friends with Saruman Thewhite._

**Merry Brandybuck****: Let's have breakfast**

_Pippin Took__ likes this._

Strider: You've already had it.

**Pippin Too****k: can't believe that some people don't know about second breakfast :(**

**Sam Gamgee:**** OMG SCARY RINGWRAITHS!!**

**Mister Frodo:**** ARAAAARRRGHGHGH**

**Mister Frodo: ****Is in intense pain**

**Sam Gamgee:**** is concerned :(**

_Mister Frodo__ is now friends with __Arwen Evenstar._

**Glorfindel:**** Is sulking and feels left out**

**Arwen Evenstar****: New to facebook lol**

_*suggest friends for Arwen*_

_Arwen Evenstar__ changed their gender to FEMALE_

_Arwen Evenstar__ changed her race to ELF_

_Arwen Evenstar__ is now using facebook in ELVISH_

_Merry Brandybuck__ is now using facebook in PIRATE_

**Sam Gamgee ****is now friends with ****Strider****.**

**Strider **** has changed his name to ****Aragorn****. **

_Aragorn __and __Arwen Evenstar__ are in a relationship._

_Two of your friends are attending_ FLIGHT TO THE FORD.

**Sam Gamgee****: YAY Frodo is Better :D**

_Bilbo Baggins wrote a new note "There and Back Again." Gandalf is tagged._

_Five of your friends are attending _THE COUNCIL OF ELROND

**Aragorn: likes being the most kingl**y.

**Mister Frodo: ****feels short and intimidated**

_Mister Frodo __is now friends with __Lord Elrond_

**Lord Elrond****: the ring cannot stay in Rivendell**

**Lord Elrond**** actually really annoying having to host council and get all this sorted out**

**Aragorn:**** elves and dwarves having their little fights, so lame**

**Mister Frodo:**** will take the ring to Mordor**

_Everyone likes this_.

**Mister Frodo**** does not know the way**

**Mister Frodo: ****Hey anyone know where Mordor is??**

_Mister Frodo__ is now friends with __Gimli Sonofgloin, Leglolas Greenleaf__, and __Boromir Ofgondor._

**Mister Frodo****: feels really noble right now.**

Sam Gamgee: U R always noble 2 me!

_Lord Elrond __gave __Aragorn__ "the shards of Narsil" using superpoke._

_9 of your friends joined the group_ THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING


	4. Quest! The Council to Moria

Hey everyone, thanks so much for the reviews :D

I still don't own facebook or any of tolkien's work

Boromir Ofgondor: thinks this is a stupid idea...

Pippin Took: Is hungry

Gandalf Thegrey: Fool of a Took!

Gimli Sonofgloin: that elf is really pissing me off.

_Legolas Greenleaf a__nd __Gimli Sonofgloin__ are no longer friends_.

Boromir Ofgondor likes Gimli SonofGloin's photo.

Boromir: Lol

Gimli SonofGloin: oh man we got so wasted that night

Boromir: I should show you my pics from the Drinking Horn of Gondor

_Nine of your friends are now attending Cahradhras_

Pippin Took: cold and hungry

Merry Brandybuck: fingrs 2 cld t2 typ proply

Legolas Greenleaf: can walk on snow

_Legolas Greenleaf__ likes this._

Pippin Took: TOO MUCH SNOW wtf

Boromir Ofgondor: Lolz Hobbits are disappearing in the snow

Sam Gamgee: hopes Mister Frodo isn't too cold

Merry Brandybuck: WTF I"M COLD what about me??

Legolas Greenleaf: LOL mortals

Aragorn: Is leading the way and is MANLY

Gandalf Thegrey: the great Eye is ever watchful...

_Gimli Sonofgloin __became a fan of _THE MINES OF MORIA.

Aragorn: Is so the man

_Aragorn__ and __Boromir Ofgondor __became fans of AWESOME HACKING SKILLZ_

Aragorn: manly and awesome hacking skills!

_Aragorn__ and __Boromir__ Ofgondor like this_.

Boromir Ofgondor: yeah we showed that creepy octopus thing!

Pippin Took: so was that a Balrog??

Gandalf: it's called the Watcher. Try to get it right.

_Nine of your friends are attending_ A JOURNEY IN THE DARK

Legolas Greenleaf: broke a fucking nail. :(

Gimli Sonofgloin: :(

Sam Gamgee: Doesn't like the dark

Pippin Took: me neither...

Gollum: iss watchingss

Mister Frodo: it's a pity Bilbo didn't kill you when he had the chance!

Legolas Greenleaf: is sensing something....

Pippin Took thinks it would be awesome to chuck a skeleton down a well!

Pippin Took never actually meant to chuck a skeleton down a well...

Merry Brandybuck: FAIL

Pippin Took: Shit sorry guys...

Gandalf Thegrey: FOOL of a Took.

Boromir Ofgondor: what's so special about kings anyway? I have a sword too.

Aragorn: Anyone else hear drums?

_Gandalf Thegrey: __added "drums in the deep" to his MUSIC._

Aragorn: hack chop slash

Gimli Sonofgloin: is avenging the deaths of his relatives.

Legolas Greenleaf: just shot a cave troll. So awesome

Aragorn: Show off.

Mister Frodo: what is it with things attacking me??? Why me?

Mister Frodo_ joined the group _PEOPLE WHO DROP THEIR WEAPONS AND FALL OVER BACKWARDS WHEN ATTACKED OR FACING DANGEROUS SITUATIONS

_nine of your friends are attending _RUNNING AWAY QUICKLY

Legolas Greenleaf: BALROG WTF

Gandalf Thegrey: Fly you fools!

Mister Frodo: NOOOO!

_eight of your friends are attending_ ESCAPE

_Gandalf Thegrey__ is no longer online. _

Mister Frodo: :(

Aragorn: yay now i'm the leader:)

_Aragorn__ likes this._


	5. Foes and friend requests!

I don't own anything that Tolkien created, nor Facebook.

Thanks for the reviews! Reviews make me happy.

This ends the Fellowship of the Ring. I might continue with the Two Towers, I'm not sure yet. What do you guys think?

__________________________________________________________________

_Eight of your friends are attending___LOTHLORIEN

**Gimli Sonofgloin**:** This place gives me the creeps**

**Gimli Sonofgloin****: THE TREES ARE STARING AT ME**

**Legolas Greenleaf: ****is happy to be back with the trees...**

**Haldir Of Lorien:** **Why do the weird hippie backpackers always try and enter Lothlorien on MY shift??**

Mister Frodo and Samwise Gamgee _are now friends with _Galadriel.

_Samwise Gamgee__ is no longer friends with __Ted Sandyman_

**Galadriel:**** Even the smallest person can change the course of the future.**

_Mister Frodo a__nd __Sam Gamgee __like this._

_Gimli Sonofgloin__ became a fan of _GALADRIEL

**Galadriel: ****will diminish, and go into the west, and remain Galadriel. **

**Mister Frodo**: What does that mean?

**Pippin Took:** **PRESENTS!**

Gimli SonofGloin: My present is the BEST.

Legolas Greenleaf: Damn it, I liked my old bow!

Boromir Ofgondor: I wanted an iPod, not a lecture.

**Aragorn****: BOATS!**

Merry Brandybuck and Legolas Greenleaf like this.

Gimli SonofGloin: where's the dislike button?

Samwise Gamgee: Exactly!

**Boromir Ofgondor****: what's so wonderful about big statues**

_Boromir ofgondor __changes his political views to anti-royalist_

**Gollum****: Isss still watchingsss**

**Mister Frodo****: is creeped out**

**Boromir Ofgondor:**** is kind of tempted...**

**Boromir Ofgondor: ****Anyone else kind of tempted?? **

**Boromir Ofgondor: ****I can haz ring??**

Mister Frodo: MINE! Piss off.

**Boromir Ofgondor****: tried to take the ring**

**Boromir Ofgondor: ****feels guilty **

**Aragorn**** resists temptation.**

_Mister_ _Frodo__ likes this._

**Aragorn:**** ORCS WOOO!!! HACKZORZ. HACK HACK HACK**

Boromir Ofgondor _added "Horn of Gondor" to his music. _

**Pippin Took: is hungry**

Merry Brandybuck: Dude, I'd be more worried about these big orcs atm

**Boromir Ofgondor:**** ouch. **

**Boromir Ofgondor:**** is mortally wounded :(**

**Boromir Ofgondor:**** has paid.**

Aragorn: No worries dude, we forgive you

Frodo Baggins: I don't.

**Merry Brandybuck:**** HELP!!!**

_Pippin Took__ and __Merry Brandybuck __joined the group_ LOTS OF ORCS AND URUK-HAI

**Pippin Took****: OH HAI I HAZ UR URUKS**

Merry Brandybuck: That's so lame.

_Boromir Ofgondor__ is no longer online._

**Aragorn:**** Another one bites the dust**

_Aragorn __created the group:_ RESCUE THE HOBBITS

_Gimli Sonofgloin __and __Legolas Greenleaf j__oined the group _RESCUE THE HOBBITS

Gimli Sonofgloin likes this

**Aragorn:**** let's hunt some Orc!**

Gimli Sonofgloin: Finally!

Legolas Greenleaf: I will hunt the MOST Orc.

Gimli Sonofgloin: It's ON.

**Mister Frodo: i****s going to Mordor alone**

**Sam Gamgee****:**__**is going to Mordor alone with Mr Frodo!**

**Sam Gamgee: ****Can't swim!**

**Mister Frodo:**** I guess I'm not going alone after all**

Sam Gamgee likes this


	6. Intro to THE TWO NOTIFICATIONS & move!

Hello everyone!

Thank you so much for all the reviews and support! I will be continuing this fic, thanks to everyone who asked. My homework will just have to learn its place.

I am going to continue with the Two Towers, and maybe even ROTK after that, however this fanfiction is MOVING. The Two Towers will stay on Fanfiction and will be authored by Aotearoan. 

Aotearoan is still me, but I've previously been using my friend and co-writer's account to publish The Fellowship of the Facebook Status Updates. As a result, I haven't been able to keep up with notifications, etc, or leave reviews when I check out the work of people who review mine, for example.

My lovely and talented friend Julia, who is much wittier than me, may hopefully be co-authoring in future, in which case she'll be credited.

Anyway, thank you so much for reading! Chapter one of The Lord of the Facebook: The Two Notifications is up now, and below is a taster! Please continue to R and R, I really appreciate it!

PS thank you to my flatmate for quiz idea, and another lovely friend for inbox idea.

_Mister Frodo__ and__ Sam Gamgee__ are attending _LAND OF SHADOW.

**Merry Brandybuck****: this can't be good...**

**Aragorn ****is running**

**Gimli Sonogloin****: hates running**

Legolas Greenleaf: cos you have short legs lol

**Legolas Greenleaf****: Just is**

Gimli Sonofgloin: Soooo original

Legolas Greenleaf: I know, I'm a deep elf.

Gimli Sonofgloin: that was *sarcasm*

_Legolas Greenleaf__ and __Gimli Sonofgloin__ are no longer friends._

**Legolas Greenleaf:**** Gimli son of Gloin son of GROIN lol**

Aragorn: great, really mature. Why don't you act your age?

Legolas Greenleaf: I AM acting my age.

Aragorn: So, what, 3000 in elf years is like, eight human years? Go and apologise to him right now.

Aragorn: feels like a babysitter.

Legolas Greenleaf: I didn't ASK to be bossed around!

Gimli Sonofgloin: in that case can you put Legolas in the naughty corner?

Aragorn: *Sigh*


End file.
